When I first started this blog, 3 1/2 years ago, I did it for a few reasons. One, I wanted to have a place where friends and family could read about my experiences with living in Mexico. And, two, I wanted to see if my views of life and my "situation" would change over time.
I never thought my opinions of living in Mexico would change. And, I'm not a closed-minded person, but thought that my life was pretty much wrecked when I had to close up shop in Indy and move to some small town in the middle of Mexico. As I have admitted, I didn't do it without my fair share of kicking and screaming.
I used to look at these pictures of the house we had just had built and get so upset. Like a life was stolen from me. But, now, I can look at them and it doesn't affect me at all. I just remember them fondly. And, I think one day, we can just do it all over again, if we choose.
So, sitting here today, after reading a friend's blog post, where she lists my blog and a description of it on her blog (She cracks me up!), I realized that my life has become "normal". She wrote:
"http://bigvz.blogspot.com/ Valarie is the Martha Stewart of my blogging world. She homeschools, she remodels, she crafts, she cooks. And than she shares all of that with the rest of us. My husband still hasn't forgiven her for giving me the idea to paint our house. "
I have felt OK for quite some time, but I really don't think about it that much. I guess with all my daily tasks, and all the other things that keep me busy, I just don't think about stuff like I used to. I equated happiness, success, and a full life to living in the States. And, while I do want to move back when we are allowed, I am totally fine living here in Mexico and I don't view the States as my only means of happiness.
I used to focus on what happened to us instead of getting past it. Immigration has been a tornado for many people. And, I think that being able to brush yourself off, and not dwelling on it is the only way to get your life back. It might not be the life you were planning. But, when does that ever happen?
When February 5th of this year came around, I didn't even remember that the day was sort of significant. I just overlooked it. February 5, 2008 was when Jorge was barred for 10 years from the US. I used to dwell on that day as well as the day that I moved down here. Sort of like an anniversary. But, I don't anymore. I don't think that should rule my life. That is why I don't ever talk about immigration on this blog. I have long moved on and started living again.
Basically, I just thought it was kind of neat, that in a list of blogs that Jennifer reads, when putting a description to mine, the words "Mexico" and "immigration" are not even a thought. It is great. And it loops back around to why I started this blog in the first place. I have changed and it feels really good.
Now, of course, this is my journey. Jorge still feels the pangs when he sees the pictures of our house in Indy. In a situation where I thought I would be the one most affected, he actually seems to have it much harder. But, one of these days, I hope all that will turn around. And, I try to make it as easy on him as possible. As far as me, I am doing OK!