Friday, October 09, 2009

where I am going...

I have been talking with a few friends and trying to find a solution for my life but keep coming to the same conclusion that there is not a solution, only different places to go. It seems that life is not willing to work with me so I need to find a way to work with it.

I am still not sure what decisions need to be made right away but I have a feeling I know what I am supposed to do now. Although I don't want to put it out there for the world just yet.

I wanted to check in and update those few readers that are curious of what is going on in the Life of Val Saga.

Jorge is lonely. He misses all his girls dearly. We talk to him via Skype on the web cam daily. Bella talks about him all the time and Emily is still too young to really mention him on her own. It breaks my heart.

I have found that moving back has been much harder than anticipated. I am pretty good at pushing emotions to the side and doing the logical thing. It is not happening that way. I find myself just wishing to go back.

I know some of you know how I felt when I was down there and it doesn't make sense that I would want to go back. I just can't explain it where it would make any sense. The easiest way to describe it is my family is broken and going back would put it back together. I guess it is just realizing what is the number one priority.

I have some thinking to do but I have a goal in mind of where I am going.

3 comments:

Cutzi said...

So great to hear from you Val. I have been wondering...

I want you to be encouraged this morning - I am very encouraged by these thoughts from you that I'm reading this morning.

We don't know each other very well... I don't know if you are a person of faith or not. I think you know that I am - I truly believe that God puts us together with our spouses, not just by coincidence but because we help each other. Families are complete, they are strength and joy to each other. I think you are with Jorge for a purpose, not by accident. That purpose may not be all that clear at the moment, but I think you are correct in saying that being together again would mend the pieces. And you have two beautiful little pieces with you that make it all much brighter and clearer.

I have prayed for you in the past and I will continue to pray that you'll all know the right direction to go.

In the mean time, don't be too hard on yourself. Sometimes we have to try things out to see how they work. Sometimes it not a matter of a right or wrong choice, but a better one.

And there I go, long winded again. Just so glad to hear from you!

Valarie said...

Cutzi!

That was such a perfect comment and one that I definitely needed to hear.

Thank you for all the prayers and encouragement. They are much needed and welcomed.

I will keep updating where my path is leading me, even though I think I know where it leads! :)

You are right, I have to try out all the options before knowing which one is the best fit.

grandmamargie said...

I was sorry to hear about you leaving Mexico although I understood completely. But it seemed, when I first started reading, that you had "settled" your little family and was making the best of a bad situation. You had done such cute things with your house, with what you had. You made things interesting for your little family. But I understood being away from home too. I hope you find the solution that will bring you peace in your heart as well as your little precious girls and of course, Jorge. Keep us posted. And be encouraged.